Monday, August 16, 2010

Day 285: a familiar feeling.

This is probably not the best news for the shiny, happy image of my sober crusade, but I've told you everything else about me, so let's wade in. You remember I said that once upon a time I was frustrated with everything, and that after a while off the piss I noticed a miraculous turn around? Natural happiness started surging through my veins, and things that had seemed awful suddenly seemed okay. No more frustration, no more unhappiness. Well I'm afraid to say the frustration is back. I don't know why it is, but I can feel doubts taking hold, dead ends forming, my confidence waning. I feel like I am doing the wrong thing somehow, like I am not where I am supposed to be. I feel like lucky breaks happen to other people. I feel like no one is helping me get to where I want to go (why should they? They have missions of their own.). And I know that negative thoughts like these aren't going to help me get anywhere better. So I need to snap out of it somehow. I have considered getting my blood tested to see if my vegan diet hasn't robbed me of my happiness nutrients. But until I do that, I plan to exercise my way back to positivity. Yoga tonight (done), running tomorrow. And whatever comes after that.


  1. A Vegan Super Smoothie I make every morning seems to lift my spirits:

    handful of ice
    half a glass of oat milk
    1/4 large tin of peaches in mango syrup
    200g of mixed frozen berries
    large teaspoon of organic spirulina powder
    large teaspoon of organic cacoa powder
    large teaspoon of organic flaxseed oil
    large teaspoon of organic acai powder
    large teaspoon of organic maca powder

    ... blend and away you go my yoga/pilates teacher ( put me onto this and my husband and I haven't looked back ever since - SO GOOD! Give it a go! Hope it brings some sunshine to your day.

  2. Things always fluctuate. Did you know that your breath switches from one nostril to another every 90 minutes or so? According to which is dominating, you will be more creative, or more receptive, logical or imaginative.
    And then every day goes from light to dark, and every month goes full moon to new moon, and there’s the tide always coming in and out, and the seasons coming and going.
    It’s a natural cycle. Nothing ever remains the same, which in itself is a consistency. Embrace the darker spots, write more songs.
    Maybe you should consult the I Ching (the Wihelm translation, naturally). It’s never wrong.