Day 280: slow mo.

Confucius said "It does not matter how slowly you go, as long as you do not stop". Apparently. According to some website. Well that's lucky, because my new band is progressing mighty slowly. At least now I know Confucius will still come to our gigs even if they happen to be happening in the year 2039. We were meant to have our first jam tonight, but due to completely legitimate and important family issues that needed handling by one band member, we didn't do it. And this is the thing. None of the hold ups are happening for want of enthusiasm, devotion or desire to reach our goal. But hold ups are happening. Just like they've been happening for the past two freakin years. Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy? I have seriously been starting to wonder whether things have been getting in my way for a reason. Maybe rock stardom is not the destination for me after all. But every time I pick up my bass, or plug in to listen to my demos, I am reminded that I have some really cool songs that simply must be taken to other ears before I die. It's almost starting to feel like a curse. Like if I could just record, package up and release these bloody songs I would finally be free to relax and pursue (or not pursue) other things. But until I do it, I'm stuck in this holding pattern of having to keep chasing the muthaflipping dream. Gosh darn it all, bother and flip! (I don't know why my language has gotten so sanitised all of a sudden. Is this another sign? Am I galloping wildly in the opposite direction of all my rock 'n' rollish tendencies?) Oh well, what can a girl do? Keep bashing her head against the door until the bastard gives way (at least that could be construed as being a little bit punk).