Thursday, December 3, 2009

Day 30: driven to distraction.

Okay, so the non-drinking has been going well. It feels natural now and not hard at all. I'm feeling leaner, really happy and more in control. My exercise is rocking, my skin has stopped flaking and I'm loving my freaky fresh new hair chop. But I have a confession to make. I have let my music focus slip. Stupidly, in my drive to not drink and in my efforts to tell you about it, I have gotten distracted from my actual goal: to pursue my rock 'n' roll dream like a hyena looking for dead flesh (THAT'S DISGUSTING). Exercise regimes, alcohol alternatives, skin treatments, party costumes and blog entries (?!) have all taken precedence over playing my bass every day, writing songs, training my vocals or any of the other myriad music orientated things I could be doing. You might remember that very early on in this mission (was it even day one?) I said that by doing this little experiment I would establish whether it was my bad partying ways or my own innate shortcomings keeping me from giving rock 'n' roll a decent bash. Well now, we can't blame getting hammered for this latest little wander in the daisies can we? Could it be that I'm just naturally fickle and flimsy of mind? My star sign is a mutable one, which means I'm restless and changeable apparently. Can I blame that? Or am I actually a little bit afraid to put maximum effort in, in case it all goes phut and I just have to admit that my best isn't good enough? Well fuck fear. And fuck pissing around like a cock and not getting anywhere. I just have to view this in the same way as I would a mid yoga class lapse in focus : you lose your balance, maybe feel like passing out momentarily, take a few deep breaths, refocus and get the fuck back into it. Simple. (Sorry for all the swearing by the way. I feel the need for strong words when I'm trying to bash myself back onto the straight and narrow. Makes me feel like I mean business damn it!) So, as a reminder, here are some wise words from the legendary Roy Ayers: "Do something every day towards your dream". This will be my new measure of whether I'm on track. Mind on the driving, hands on the wheel, keep my dopey eyes on the road ahead, and something for the music every single day.

Oh and just because it's sunny: the man himself. (Check out the keyboardist's cardi.)

P.S. I think my minor freak the other day about things not moving fast enough, was actually secretly about my own faffing around. Man I'm awesome.


  1. As the mind clears so the focus returns - so I'm told! If you make the foundations solid then rest will follow - you can't always force it - somedays it just doesn't work or your head isn't right, other days you fly for no apparent reason - its all part of this wonderful but totally indefinable process of creativity. How many times have you played a bass line or put down a section of a track or a vocal and then thought 'shit where did that come from?' Sometimes its even scary,like voices talking to you in another language. I love it!

    Check this out - some familiar themes perhaps?

  2. Yeah I've totally had songs come to me fully formed. Like I didn't write them, I just received them from somewhere else. Those ones always sort of occur in a flash and compel you to sit down immediately and put them down. Weirdness (and coolness!) indeed.